This question has haunted philosophers through the ages. Kierkegaard said love should focus on the person being loved first and foremost. Martin Buber said love was something more significant than affect – not a static feeling, but a dynamic state of being lived in the present. He also said we look for our soul mate to complete what we lack and silence the deep loneliness and feeling of separateness. Some have defined it as feelings of deep romantic or sexual attachment to someone. With all of these, sadly and strangely, we can end up with throw-away love relationships missing more mature and developing love. Psychology has defined it as a complex emotion involving strong feelings of affection and tenderness for the love object.
I have a different understanding of love. I see love as an ACTION based on decisions we make about ourselves, others, and God. It is a choice of what kind of person we want to be. Nice? Mean? Loving? Bitter? Kind? Caring? Want to make a difference in this life? Or getting and taking everything we can in life? The bottom line is, are we going to love or not? One brings love and hope, the other pain, selfishness, and sorrow.
Love is a choice of wanting the highest level of good for ourselves, others, and the world – physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Choosing to love with agape love makes actions happen for the higher good of all life. Healing is one of those choices. In its highest form, agape love is God’s love which always wants our highest good.
When we love, we gain the following gifts:
- It helps release pain and bitterness.
- Help others and the world heal and be less violent.
- Make a difference and help others to do so too.
- What is love to you?
- What kind of person have you decided to be?
- When did you feel the love that helped you to heal and grow?
Please share these to help others heal. Also, I am a speaker, invite me!